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TOP TEN: Rejected Gibson product expansion ideas

Ronnie Dungan • MMR Global • August 28, 2015

A top secret mole has revealed to us a list of scrapped brand expansion proposals from a Gibson Brands meeting…

 

 

 

 

10: The Les Pool – sold maple neck comes with extendable truss rod cue with chalkable tip

9: The Bear Grylls Explorer  – officially approved by the UK’s premier Etonian forest tramp, chunk out some riffs while you’re making use of the many added extra survival tools, including removable snake gutting tremolo

8: The 24-string. (Note to design department – ignore all input from that marketing guy we hired from Gillette)

7: Plastic. Let’s just make it all out of plastic. Enough of those fricking Feds already.

6: The Les Paul Senior – large print on the dials, wheelchair friendly, waterproof and loud, it’s gonna have to be really loud.

5: Firebird X – LOL. Nice try Mr Comedian. We’re here to work.

4: The Rickroller – no matter what you play, it comes out as Rick Astley. (Idiots! Why wouldn’t anyone want this?)

3: The kids love Potter. Anything with Harry Potter. Has anyone trademarked “Exploriamus”?.

2: Gibson SG. SG for Shot Gun. I mean who doesn’t like shooting stuff? Get on the phone to Ted Nugent about endorsement.

1: What if it was edible? 3D printing, that’s big. Can it be done with bacon?

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