Wrong Direction? Sorry, Chief – No Direction Yet

Last January, MMR’s longtime publisher Sid Davis wrote in his editorial column about the floppy-haired moppets in One Direction, the Simon Cowell-created boy band phenomenon. “I hold no ill will towards the five young guys from across the pond, widely heralded as the ‘new British Invasion’,” he commented. However, when compared to the “fab four” of a time long gone by (very long. Yikes!), Sid noted the following: “The Beatles – aside from their legendary ability as tunesmiths and players – made a generation conscious of their instruments: George Harrison’s Rickenbacker; Ringo’s Premier and Ludwig kits; Lennon’s Epiphone; and McCartney’s Hofner and Martin, to name just a few. Add Gretsch, Gibson, Fender, and Vox to the [Beatles’] mix and you had a cornucopia of product silently, but effectively, endorsed by the skills of their masters.”

What’s changed in the past year on the pop charts?  Well, as of this late December 2013 writing, those One Direction kids are – according to Billboard – down one notch from the previous week’s tally with their most recent release, Midnight Memories, now at #2 on the Top 200 (boo hoo…). The #1 spot belongs to Garth Brooks – not bad for an artist who retired back at the beginning of the aughts (and, notably, the only person at the top of the charts who even really pretends to play a musical instrument). The Top 5 is rounded off by Kelly Clarkson, Britney Spears, and the album, Duck the Halls – the holiday release from the cast of the reality show Duck Dynasty.  Seriously.

If part of the point of Mr. Davis’ editorial from last year was to ask – I’m using my own words now and very definitely not his – “Are you @&$*% serious with this nonsense?” the sad reality would seem to be that we haven’t progressed much and the same question remains.

Harry Styles, the erstwhile leader of One Direction, claims to “play the kazoo,” which puts him, somewhat ironically, in roughly the same musical category as his fellow top-5ers, the avian-calling Robertsons of Duck Dynasty. Hohner, Lyons, Grover, and others do make kazoos, so perhaps this will be the start of something big. Just as the ukulele craze is coming back down to earth, maybe we’ll have the new, One Direction-inspired “golden age of kazoo.”  Yeah, probably not.

So what else – is there any mainstream media exposure  that may benefit the MI world? As profiled in Matt Parish’s ‘MI in the Media’ that will run in our February issue, the Coen Brothers’ current film, Inside Llewyn Davis, does give ample and positive screen-time to guitars and guitar-players. Also, in the coming months, the movie Grand Piano (Elijah Wood, John Cusack) shines the spotlight – not surprisingly – on the classic keyboard console. So it’s not that musical instruments have faded entirely from the general consciousness; it’s more that, as with many (most) recent years, there doesn’t seem to be that one person, show, song, or phenomenon that’s going to be a real game-changer.

It’s not all bad, however. Far from it. Most reports peg the acoustic guitar category (including mandolins, banjos, et cetera) as having grown somewhere in the neighborhood of 35 percent since 2009. And, even though I just referred to the ukulele market as “coming back down to earth,” the fact is that ukes are still flying off the wall at many MI stores (check our “50 Dealer/50 State Forecast” from last month’s issue). Meanwhile, management consultants Mainstream Management projected “significant growth” for the year that just ended, with an expected annual uptick, industry-wide, of six percent.

“Surely there must be an opening among the countless number of infommercials hawking stain removers, or sandwiched between the tribulations of owning a pawnshop and America’s Funniest Home Videos, for programming featuring talent other than song and dance,” Sidney postulated last January. A fair assumption on Mr. Davis’ part, but based on current viewing, listening, and buying trends, we’re still in the same holding pattern, waiting for some clever television programmer to stumble upon the notion that folks actually playing real instruments might resonate with audiences – and might jumpstart our industry.

Here’s hoping.  Happy 2014, all!